Having said that, by making some adjustments things seem to be better. But then there is always the doubt of "what if that is not enough?", "what if it just seems like you're better?"... Honestly, I've just been trying to avoid this issue (like I do with things which scare me), which is probably a bad thing to do! - I really should snap out of the "paralysed by fear" and confront it really, as ignoring it just drags the fear along... If that makes sense!
But you know what? - at the end of the day, I'm still here and am still able to do what I want to do most of the time, and I am grateful for that! It's just that sometimes it seems like PH just complicates things and gets in the way, then suddenly just slaps you in the face... However, I have started to try and change my mindset from just just reacting to whatever happened/being down about things not going well to being more... proactive? ... I guess being in charge of my health more... Only took me like four years, haha!
However negative I may be feeling, the main thing is I've alive and (sort of) well. As the above quote says, I won't let these worries control me anymore, focus on the positives and keep focusing on getting better. I won't keep myself in this weird limbo for much longer, as it's not a great place to be in!
Hope this post made sense, and it's not been just a weird babble!
Cheers,
Maho